The “F” Word

BY Anum Bashir

As my husband and I gear up to welcome the fourth decade of our lives (rather apprehensively), we’re all about serious discussions pertaining to transitions, change, new chapters, and the future.

I think in communicating more frequently with one another, we’re adopting a more “if you can’t beat it, joint it,” kind of attitude with regards to our 30s.

And so, it got me thinking about the “F” word - no, not ‘fuck’ you guys……. the ‘FUTURE’!!!

Not too long ago, Waqas and I sat down one weekend evening to just talk - because life has become all too consuming with work, and the much needed ‘talk time’ gets thrown to the wayside. We broached the subject of moving - no, not out of our home, but in fact to another city to take our careers hopefully to the next level. Change is good, and we’re both at this point in our lives where we’re ready for a new backdrop, and to concur new territory. I’m probably more for it than he is to be honest. We then introduced the idea to my parents. It’s always good to have a sounding board when you’re about to entertain the idea of packing your life lock, stock, and barrel to move to another country. But soon after talking to my mom about this whole thing (who I must admit scared us in a corner - mainly because I feel she doesn’t ACTUALLY want us to move), we came to realize that moving ain’t easy.

Never one to shy away from a challenge I tried to explain to my mother, but mostly convince myself that I’m up to the challenge of starting over again, even though, yes i know, I’m now 30! Gosh, sometimes it sounds like I’ve contracted a terrible disease.  

She started throwing all these very ‘adult’ questions at us: “Who’s going to sponsor you? You need a sponsor to move to Dubai guys. What about health insurance? When are you going to have a baby Anum? You’re 30, and it’s all downhill after this if you don’t NOW! Do you know the percentage of pregnancies that result in chromosomal defects when you’re in your 30s?”


If anyone knows me, panic set in real quick. Was my mother actually trying to help me or deter me? I think a little of both, but she did make some good points. Waqas and I do want to move sooner rather than later, but it would obviously take a lot more planning than a conversation on a couch. 

So what’s my purpose of writing this today? I’m trying to get help and advice from all of you out there who have quit jobs, left home, and taken the conscious step of calling another country home for a while. How did you do it? Was it hard? 

Help…….. The ‘F’ word is scary, but its inevitable. Might as well start the planning now and just enjoy the ride, whatever it may be!

Image Credit: Unknown

Check Out More Stories Here...

Share On